What Not to Say in Child Custody Mediation

Jan 21, 2025

Child custody mediation allows parents to resolve disputes without going to court. It is intended to encourage cooperation and create a parenting plan that serves the child’s best interests. However, what is said during mediation can significantly impact the outcome. Statements that indicate an unwillingness to co-parent or prioritize personal grievances over the child’s well-being can be detrimental. At Levitsky Law Firm PLLC, we assist parents throughout the mediation process and advocate for custody arrangements that protect their parental rights and their child’s future.

Avoid Negative Remarks About the Other Parent

Speaking poorly about the other parent can be damaging during mediation. Judges and mediators expect parents to work together for the child’s benefit. Criticizing the other parent, making personal attacks, or questioning their abilities may be perceived as an attempt to alienate them rather than a genuine concern for the child’s well-being. A cooperative approach demonstrates a willingness to foster a positive co-parenting relationship, which can influence custody decisions.

Do Not Make Absolute Statements

Statements such as “I will never allow my child to stay with them” or “They will never be a good parent” can work against a parent in mediation. A rigid stance suggests an unwillingness to compromise, which can negatively impact the outcome. Instead, expressing concerns in a way that focuses on the child’s needs is more effective. A divorce lawyer in Brooklyn can help parents present their concerns while demonstrating a reasonable and cooperative attitude.

Refrain from Focusing on Financial Motives

Bringing up financial matters in a way that overshadows the child’s needs can be detrimental. The court’s primary concern is the child’s emotional and physical well-being, not parental financial disputes. If financial concerns need to be addressed, they should be framed to emphasize how they impact the child’s stability and welfare rather than personal monetary burdens.

Do Not Express Unwillingness to Follow the Agreement

Statements such as “I’ll just do what I want anyway” or “This agreement won’t matter” may give the impression that a parent is not taking the process seriously. Such remarks can result in an unfavorable outcome or even a court-imposed custody arrangement. Demonstrating a willingness to comply with the agreement shows a commitment to the child’s well-being. Parents seeking legal guidance can visit our family law practice area to learn more about custody mediation and family law in New York.

Avoid Treating Custody as a Competition

Mediation is not about “winning” custody. Approaching the discussion as if it is a battle for control can be harmful. Statements that suggest a desire to “get custody” rather than “develop a parenting plan” may be viewed negatively. The courts favor custody arrangements that allow both parents to be involved in their child’s life unless there is evidence of neglect or harm. Brooklyn divorce lawyers assist parents in presenting their case with a focus on the child’s best interests.

Do Not Bring Up Past Relationship Issues

Mediation should focus on the child, not the parents’ past relationship issues. Bringing up arguments, infidelities, or unrelated grievances can shift the conversation from what truly matters. The discussion should center on the child’s needs, routine, and overall well-being. Legal representation can help keep discussions productive and goal-oriented if staying focused on the matter is challenging.

Avoid Making Unrealistic Promises

In an effort to appear cooperative, some parents may agree to terms they cannot realistically follow. If the agreement is impractical, saying, “I’ll agree to whatever they want” or “We’ll figure it out later” can lead to problems. Parents should carefully consider any commitments before making them. Working with a divorce lawyer in Brooklyn, NY, ensures that any agreements made during mediation are fair, reasonable, and aligned with parental rights and responsibilities.

Approach Mediation with Caution and Care

What is said during mediation can have a lasting impact on custody arrangements. Being thoughtful, cooperative, and solution-oriented can help secure a fair agreement that benefits the child. Parents in Brooklyn and Manhattan who need legal support in child custody matters can review client testimonials to learn how Levitsky Law Firm PLLC has successfully helped families with their cases.

At Levitsky Law Firm PLLC, we provide dedicated legal representation to parents involved in custody mediation. Our firm is committed to protecting parental rights and helping clients achieve the best possible outcome. Contact us today to schedule a consultation if you are preparing for mediation.